Breastfeeding, Family, Newborn, Parenting, Uncategorized

Breast…Bottle…Bottle…Breast. Does it matter how I feed my baby??

We all know the big never ending breastfeeding debate continues and mums continue to feel judged by how they decide to feed their baby.

Now I breastfed Mop Top for about 3 months and am currently breastfeeding Bear, not because I have an over whelming desire to but I guess just because I felt I should. (By who I’m not sure)

img_7984I can’t even count the amount of times I have been asked ‘are you feeding baby yourself?’….. no I’m starving him!!! I know full well they mean am I breastfeeding but I just don’t understand why people ask that question. In fact I found myself asking a friend recently if she was breastfeeding her newborn and her response felt like she was justifying why she was bottle feeding. Why on earth should us mums feel the need to justify how we feed our baby. I had one lady mid way through an exercise class say ‘are you breast feeding, it’s so easy isn’t it’ well actually no it’s not!!

I can feel my self getting angry as I’m writing this. But I feel we have enough pressures put on us as new mums without the added stress of trying to fulfil societies desire for us to breastfeed.

Breastfeeding Mop Top was never easy, i am not one of those mums who took to breastfeeding like a duck to water (excuse that saying.) I felt awkward, could never get the right position, always seemed to wear the wrong top, used to finish feeding with huge wet patches on me. So when I got mastitis around 3 months that was the final straw and she went to formula.
I remember when Bear was born, it was about day 4 and breastfeeding was proving so hard. I sat in our bedroom and cried in pain as Bear screamed for more milk, with a feeling of guilt smothering me as Mr DC suggested we give him formula. I wanted him to have breast milk so was convinced I’d be able to pump exclusively. I sent Mr DC out at about 9o clock at night to buy a manual pump. I’d googled it, asked friends who’d done it and it was possible.
Oh wow what a faff!!! Every 2 hours up I’d go pump what I could and then feed him that way. It didn’t last long as for us it just wasn’t doable especially with a demanding 12 month old.
Now I am combination feeding Bear and have done since about six weeks. I heard the teat/nipple confusion argument from multiple health visitors but felt it was right for us. We opted for Avent bottles as were advertised as naturally shaped teats ideal for combination feeding. So we introduced one bottle at lunch time and one at bed time the rest he has from the breast. For us this works, I feel less pressure, Mr DC can do bed times, the lunch time bottle fits in with Mop Top. He is now 4 months and this way is working really well.

img_7982I appreciate the whole breast is best debate but surely the formula made today is as nutritious and nourishing as needed. If i compare Mop Top who had 3 months of breast milk with my friends baby who was bottle fed from birth, developmentally they are exactly the same, at the same stage and doing similar things.

It is 2016 and mums are still being judged on whether they breast or bottle feed their baby. It’s crazy. Mums should do what they feel is right and fits into their life style.

I really do not want to get into a breast feeding vs bottle feeding debate, but wanted to share our experience. If you are the mum who exclusively breast fed right up to age 1…. great, if you bottle feed your baby from birth …. great! As long as that baby is well fed, well loved does it really matter.

img_7986Please don’t judge us mums as we are all in this together and it is by no means a competition.

Have a great weekend
Love Kelly
Xx

4 thoughts on “Breast…Bottle…Bottle…Breast. Does it matter how I feed my baby??”

  1. Hmm this is a very sensitive subject for lots of people. I am lucky I’m not too sensitive about it or I think I would have lost the plot by now. My bubba was a month early c section induced and intensive care and tube fed, I was sent home and away from her for 13 ‘nights, v stressed trying to hand pump and express which happened a little bit after 5 days for about 4 days. Expressing every 3 hours and the pressure from the hospital to breast feed with a poorly baby is huge,Literally forcing you pump and go to express even when your clearly in pain and stressed – I took the pressure because I wanted to breast feed however I didn’t hold our baby for the first week so that was difficult as she had my milk mixed with her formula for a few days then I developed mastitis from trying so hard and didn’t want to take medication incase that got into the baby’s body so just hoped the mastitis would go away…. which is didn’t for a good month. Our baby had to be on a very well planned eating plan before she came out and she was only 4lb 6 born so needed feeding up and was screaming for more fed formular every day which was great as she was putting weight and getting better slowly as she needed nutrition to help her absorb medication so couldn’t wait for my milk and had to formula feed to keep up with her demands to sort out rather than wait for the breast milk. It was just a overall very difficult situation. We have had all sorts of problems with the formula and we are currently prescribed a very special milk anti allergy everything. I really really do wish I could have breast fed so these digestive issues maybe wouldn’t have been as bad ( that’s a while different situation lot of probs) I’m personally not that keen on formula Nutrition even tho it is complete I feel it’s just not natural- that’s just my opinion and I’m not judgemental for anyone how they feed their baby. I do personally believe breast is best but ….and a big BUT sometimes things simply just don’t work out how you wish they could and yes formulae fed babies are just as healthy in most cases. To this day random people daily question me and many look at me in disgust and comment when they see me feeding a tiny baby from a bottle- and people really do push to find out why and I do tell people straight why and even then some people still look at me with a judging unimpressed look on their faces. It’s lucky that I have been in a good frame of mind and won’t let people small minded ways get me down. I must admit I am shocked at the negative attitude from many people even when they know the facts they still feel and say ohh shame you couldn’t have just tried it for a bit longer as it may have sorted its self out… silly comments like that. Just can’t wait to get the weaning into full swing to be honest

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    1. Thank you for sharing your story. I appreciate breast milk is natural but why are mothers feeling so pressured into the guilt of formula when it could do more harm By causing the mother stress overdrive. And with added medical issues to contend with.
      It amazes me that you are judged for feeding your baby formula. It sounds like you really tried to offer breast milk even causing yourself stress and discomfort in an already stressful situation. How is your little one doing now? You seem to be doing amazing… well done you!!! Oh and weaning so fun and so messy lol

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